sex, lies, and .jpgs


August 25th, 2008 at 12:08 pm

The Single Coolest Thing You Will EVAR Read This Week

Yeah, yeah yeah – so we’ve got Obama, Biden, les famille Clinton, and the rest of the DNC doing its weeklong sword-swallowing routine this week. We’ve got shit gone down in Georgia, Michael Phelps as our new lord and master, and something about Madonna touring again. That’s all good and well; whatever. This is better. This, dear reader (citation needed), is a true-life story – about ninjas. In New Jersey.

Let’s face it – everybody loves ninjas. Whether it’s the honor-bound Kurosawa variety, the let’s-kill-everything ninjas that overpopulate video games, or just plain old Ask A Ninja, ninjas are hot right now.

Well, except for these guys. Two young men from New Jersey, fed up with the drug lords, decided to take matters into their own hands. Throwing-star style. They dressed up in black duds, including SWAT-like vests, grabbed a potpourri of weapons (most likely from the local flea market), including stars, nunchucks, knives, and swords. Then they set about their grim, post-post-modern Batman mode of revenge against the drug dealers of the world.

Unfortunately, they didn’t get very far. Calling themselves Shinobi, they left really angry letters at the homes/burnt-out crack dens of area drug dealers and friends they suspected of smoking ‘the pot’. And then the cops arrested them. Which I am pretty sure is enough to be kicked out of the Ninjas Local 101. Because ninjas just don’t get arrested by the NJPD. It just doesn’t happen.

Storm Shadow would be so disappointed.

But just for trying - to be heroes, to be funny, to make a difference and in doing so, give the world collective pause enough to go ‘WTF?’ Ladies and gentlemen, these are your official Junkbuzzed Not a Douches of the Week:



Share and Enjoy: These icons link to social bookmarking sites where readers can share and discover new web pages.
  • Digg
  • Facebook
  • Google
  • StumbleUpon
  • Technorati
  • e-mail
  • LinkaGoGo
  • Ma.gnolia
  • NewsVine
  • PopCurrent
  • Propeller
  • Reddit
  • Simpy
  • TwitThis

Related posts:

  1. And Now, TSM Would Like to Say a Few Words on Polyamory
  2. My Morning Junket: Ugly Girls Wanted, How to Get the Most Out of Your Guantanamo Fetish, Spencer’s Gifts Still Sucks After All These Years, and Leave That Dog Alone, You Douche

  • 1

    Awww. Someone needs to give them a reach-around.

    Ellie on August 26th, 2008
  • 2

    A very stealthy, ninja-approved reach-around. Too much grunting and ball-flopping is not the way of the ninja.

    The Snarling Misanthrope on August 26th, 2008


RSS feed for comments on this post | TrackBack URI